Her struggle reflects things within her that are good, and some that are obstacles. The good is the honest recognition that before God and holy men and women who have consecrated their entire lives, we rightly feel a bit unworthy. We are fallen creatures after all. On the other hand, the worst of us still bear the image of God. Each person on this planet was specifically brought into existence by God. He desires a relationship with each one - this includes you.
If we struggle in the same way, we should mediate on the parable of prodigal son. We should see ourselves as the prodigal and God as the father. He longs for our return and regardless of the level of depravity to which we have lowered ourselves, he eagerly waits for us. Then, the second he sees our hearts turning his way, he opens his arms. He not only offers us forgiveness, but heaven and earth begin to rejoice with our returning.
Turn to him and those whom he has consecrated to serve you to him. He has provided priests and consecrated in order to help you come to him. Don't deny him when he has given so much for you. He is eagerly waiting for a deeper relationship with you.
If you are ready but struggling with your next step, respond to this post with a question, or email us and we can talk off line.
Blessings to you as you seek Him!